I was Thinking, or Not

  Death’s Bloody Drum This is a work in progress.  Most of the pieces are all raw unedited and still will need some work to finish them properly.  No one cares, I know that, but there it is anyway. I have no date for release, but the drafts are here, there and everywhere, just waiting to be polished and packaged and put up for sale, someday. JD

  Another Jane I am on the bus to nowhere And she slips in beside me Her lithe frame barely there Her dress is tattered and torn She tries to smile Her sadness remains No I don’t know her name Just another lost soul She gets off at the next stop Shuffles along the aisle The driver seems annoyed I step up and pay her fare I sit back in my seat Watching her disappear I think of her sometimes When I feel I’ve had enough When life gets me down When if seems a waste I think of her half smile The sadness contained Never seen her again Likely dead in some alleyway Buried in a potter's grave Another nameless Jane JD

  Art of Blood Sports Never served, too many already eating that grit My daddy was a nurse, general’s aide forever PFC Found out later, he really was a dandy man Made no difference to me, I didn’t score that play Knew too many that ate blood guts and gore Smiled with rotted teeth, scars that do not heal Smell of cheap whiskey with cloudy eyes Streets are full of the forgotten heroes dying alone I’ve known my own hell too Though self constructed Just as real to me you see As age has taken most of my capacity Them are all gone Time is not kind The wheel grinds Their memories fade And still old fat bastards play games Churn the milk of human kindness Not sweet cream butter for bread But rotting bodies on the killing fields JD

  Pass by Me Why am I still here Just a battered ram Battered to the bone Converted to a mule Not a very good one at that With a sway back Hobbled legs and matted mane Still I force myself to remain To try to achieve anything While I watch death dance I wonder why she passes me by JD

  The Whole I am digging a hole in the ground Where I can lay my body down So, I do not have to deal With the grinding of the wheel And everything dying around me For there is no more left in me No more tears to cry No more to care for Just an empty haul That is no longer whole 41025 JD

Network, network, network, that is what they tell me. I am so far away from that anymore. Just trying to get through the day. Morning comes much too early, and my work begins with sorting out the animals.  Feed the rabbits and the chickens, make sure their water is still clean, Then I try to do some housework, it is all so overwhelming I just want to throw it all out, start over again. We have chicks, but the numbers are so disheartening. Just four out of 18 eggs hatching, not really good results, but I guess that says all there is to say about me. I will have to work harder. I will have to keep going. Day after day, as I feel the death all around me. I don't even know what I am saying anymore. I've gotten off the train, but my thoughts are still sailing.